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Junes 1st Sunday...

Last Sunday the weather was beautiful - so I sipped my coffee on our deck and listened to the birds chirp and really, it was quite lovely. 

It was the best of escapes - for in the wee early hours of the morning, I received a phone call that dropped my heart into the pit of my stomach.  My brain was still fuzzy with sleep and my eyes struggled to open, but the familiar voice on the other line was patient as I slowly sat up in bed and asked him to repeat the very words he spoke. 

"Sarah. I'm on my way to the hospital.  Mathew was killed in a car accident tonight.  Dave needs me there."

Shock. Complete shock had taken over my body and I only remember a click and silence on the other end of the line. 

Mathew was only 18.  Things like this aren't supposed to happen.  Things like this aren't supposed to happen to people we know and love.  He's a part of our family - he was a part of our family.  Life is forever changed.  Life....

I spent the rest of the morning wandering my house - checking in on my own kids, watching them sleep in their beds, undisturbed by the news I had received minutes, maybe hours, before. 

Eventually I worked my way out to the deck - the night was still heavy and night creatures made their sounds and I just sat in my chair.  I sat there long enough to watch the sun begin to rise, coffee untouched and cold.  This didn't just happen - none of this can possibly be real.  It just can't. 

But it was real.  Every sickening moment of it was real.  And I couldn't shake how ill it made me feel.  His parents, friends, family.... 

.   .   .   .   .

I understand that this post may be hard to imagine, or to read.   But this reality is one that I needed to share with all of you.  

Please, tell your loved ones how much they matter - all the time.  Tell them you love them.  Squeeze them and hold them tight.  Our time here is never guaranteed, and in the blink of an eye, its over and gone...

XOXOXO
Bless you all, 
Sarah.

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